Dot, Comment Fixing and the First 4days of 2010

First of all - Dot: I'm sorry you couldn't comment on my blog - some others have been having issues. I have removed the word verification aspect, but if it still doesn't work can someone let me know? I'll go back to the normal blogger layout because I'd rather have comments :)

Anyways, as always, especially from you, your post made me smile. I can never thank you, or anyone who comments, enough for the support and encouragement no matter where I am (or where I have been). Dot, YOU are a wonderful person. You're absolutely beautiful and so strong - completely admirable. I wish you the best for this New Year.

These first few days have been rollercoaster-y on the eating front, completely and annoyingly level on the weight front and increasingly better on the life front. Make sense? Good... yeah.

Starting with the life front. Most of you probably don't know, but last year I was FAR far closer to the graduating class than people in my own grade. It had to do with a maturity aspect and the fact that they appreciated me a lot more as someone who was often in a position of power (especially in theatre). That has led, I think, to the shock of having to deal with people of my own age this year - and the abandonment that comes with it. Anywho - the Gr.12s from last year were back these last 2weeks for Christmas and I've been out every night skating or having coffee or watching movies or whatever. It was like pumping steroids in to my social life. I'm going to miss it, but having them back has uped my confidence a little, you know? Maybe this semester will go a little bit better.

I've been sticking to my resolution too. I used to shut my eyes when I undressed to go to the shower, but I now force myself to look in the mirror and to look at the scars and the rolls. I force myself to say: OK. This is me. Time to change.

Change, however, is not coming quite yet. I've been 137-141 all throughout Christmas break. UGH.

HOWEVER. There is change a-comin'. Firstly, I have renewed my gym membership and my commitment to exercise. I've been twice so far and once school starts it'll be much easier as it's only a 10min walk. So, what's going to happen is I am going to BALLOON to 150-155 for a week as my body goes - "Oh shit muscle, oh shit water, oh shit lactic acid!" then I'll drop back to 140 and start losing HOPEFULLY.

Moreover, my mother has let me join her on a "cleanse" for support. However, she won't let me take the pills and laxatives that come along with the actual cleanse, so, for me, it's really just a diet. Which she is ok with for some reason. Anyways, it's a 12day Wild Rose Cleanse. This constitutes:

• no wheat
• no sugar (brown, white or honey)
• no oil or peanuts
• no processed food
• no dairy products (milk, cheese, yogurt, cottage cheese)
• no exotic fruits (only pears and apples)
• no beef

Sound like a recipe for weightloss or what? The ideal diet is fish, almonds and brown rice.

Today was Day 1 and I am committed! I can't bring myself to post a real before picture... maybe half way through. How about measurements?

Waist: 25"
Thigh: 22" (GAG, almost as thick as my waist!)
Belly: 29.5" (GAG)
Bust: 34" (poor little A's)
Hips: 39" (GAG)

Weight: 140
Height: 5"9.5"
BMI: 20.3

It's about time too. There has been cake and all other manner of shit in my house for the last few days. Plus, my secret santa at work got me a basket of Lindor chocolates as her gift to me. Whoopee. Out of the 40, I only had 3 I think - the rest I shared. Which is a small victory since those things are bloody delicious.

So, the picture is my outfit for a recent Murder Mystery party. I was a bitchy, Caribbean debutante-heiress named "Berri". Sorry for the random, rambling post. I'm avoiding homework and facebook is no longer interesting me... Hope everyone is having a wonderful week!